This knowing, feeling, wanting, yearning
seeking, churning, grasping, stirring,
gut-wrenching, time-stopping desire
unknown or embraced,
has left me without a face to use in life
but merely masks to hide behind.
I try to unravel my knotted place;
untwist, unturn, untie my interwoven parasite
embodied in what I have created
through worried conversation
with time and 'whit-if' things.
But my pulling, wrenching, turning, reeling,
tugging, pushing, peeling, churning
strength-surging, energy-moving self
cannot overcome the battle
that I have sworn to rule over,
which, instead, rules over me.
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